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Warning !!!: these lyrics are COPYRIGHT protected.
Stabbing Westward
Wither, Blister, Burn And Peel
1996
1: I Don't Believe
I'm such an asshole
god I'm such a stain
I just keep fucking up again and again
you crawled inside my mind when you crawled into my bed
said everything I've ever longed to hear
so perfect, so alive, once inside you sucked me dry
you used me up and left me here for dead
I crave it desperately, a cancer eating me
an addiction too intense to be denied
worthless, I'm a whore, crawling back for more
it's pathetic how I feed off this abuse
you told me that you love me
and I believed you loved me
but you swore that you loved me
and I believed... now I know it was a lie
(chorus)
I don't believe
I don't believe
that I could be so stupid and so naive
I don't believe
I don't believe
that there is nothing, nothing left for me
2: Shame
I only see myself reflected in your eyes
so all that I believe I am essentially are lies
and everything I've hoped to be or ever thought I was
died with your belief in me so who the hell am I?
I'm wandering 'round confused
wondering why i try
the more that you deny my pain
the more it intensifies...
I pray for someone to ache for me the way I ache for you...
if you ignore that I'm alive
I've nothing to cling to
I stare into this mirror
so tired of this life
if only you would speak to me or cared if i'm alive
once i swore i would die for you
but i never meant like this
I don't know if I'm real without you
what is left of me without you?
I don't know what's real without you
HOW CAN I EXIST WITHOUT YOU?
3: What Do I Have To Do?
you make it hard to breathe
it's as if I'm suffocating
and when you're next to me
I can feel your heartbeat through my skin
it makes me sad to think
this could all be for nothing
I wish there was a way
a way for you to see inside me
I've never felt this way
about anyone or anything
TELL ME
what do I have to do
to make you happy?
what do i have to do
to make you understand?
what do i have to do
to make you want me?
and if I can't make you want me
what do i have to do?
I know exactly what you're thinking
but I swear this time I will not let you down
I'm not as selfish as I used to be
that was a part of me that never made me proud
right now I think I would try anything
anything at all to keep you satisfied
God I hope you see what losing you would do to me
all I want is one more chance, tell me
what do I have to do
to forget about you?
4: Why
I am not here
I think I've never
been here at all
or ever will
I feel like a place
where no one goes anymore
why can't you see that everything's broken?
and why can't you see that my life's turned gray?
I can't believe in anything sacred
when I don't believe that I am real
it seems so bizarre
but none of this matters
thoughts disappear and hopes have died
but now i am safe, nothing can hurt me here
why can't you see my need for forgiveness
the truth and the lies so confused as one
I can't believe in anything sacred
when I don't believe in anything
I am alone
locked in my memories
there's nowhere left for me to hide
but I am not real
I've made all I am with lies
why does it seem that everything's different?
and why does it seems that only you are real?
I don't believe in anything sacred
so why do I feel so damned alone?
(chorus)
I need someone to break the silence
screaming in my head
and in my soul
5: Inside You
I feel your lips
I taste your skin
I need to know
I need to feel you from within
as your blood burns through my skin
I feel complete
I breathe you in
it's where you end and I begin
if only I could stay here... forever
so much to tell you
so much to show you
so much to confide
now that I'm inside you
we are flesh
we are one
so why do I
feel so much guilt for what I've done?
as your blood burns through my skin
I feel release
I breathe you in
it's where you end and I begin
if only I could stay here... forever
so much to tell you
so much to give you
so much to confide
now that I'm inside you
so much to teach me
so much to show me
so much to give me
so much to tell me
6: Falls Apart
I'm tangled and broken
left scattered on the floor
it's useless now
these pieces they
can never make make me whole
you wither
and you blister
I watch you burn and peel
it's not like you
can save me
it's not like you even care
I'm finding it so hard to hold on
this is where it falls apart
this is where it falls apart
I feel helpless as my everything
comes crashing down on me
this is where it falls apart
this is where it falls apart
I feel helpless as my fucking world
comes crashing down
crashing down on me
wasted
useless
pointless
scattered
broken
pointless
wrinkled
shattered
withered
blistered
?
pointless
wasted
useless
scattered
?
7: So Wrong
wasted thoughts of you
desperate prayers to you
give me back my mind
I'm empty inside
what have I become?
everything's undone
a candle burns here in your honor
my soul, a shrine i've built for you
there's nothing left inside me
nothing left inside but you
can't seem to pretend
this night needs to end
I can't fill this hole
you are all i know
it's so wrong that I need you
it's so wrong that I need abuse
it's so wrong that I need you
so wrong that I'm scared I'll die alone
8: Crushing Me
I'm feeling the weight of the world
and it's crushing me
I'm feeling the weight of everyday life
and it's crushing me
how much more will it take
how much more until it breaks me
this world is crushing me
I'm feeling the hate of the world
and it's crushing me
I'm feeling the hate of everyday life
and it's crushing me
I've spent every moment since the day you left
attempting to regain the shattered remains of my pathetic life
working to be someone you can be proud of
someone you can love again
I have given you everything that I have to give
everything i'm able to give
taking into consideration your reluctance to accept anything I have to offer
I'm tired of living my life for you
I'm tired of living for everyone else in this world
I'm tired of...?
I swallow the hate, betrayal and lies
swallow it whole, shove it deep down inside of me
feeling the weight of the world, and it's crushing me
how much more will it take?
how much more until it breaks me?
this world is crushing me
9: Sleep
she's been here so many times before she can't remember
when she last felt anything at all but this pain and anger
she stares intently at the door, listens for his footsteps
she knows exactly what's in store, and the knowing makes it worse
when he calls her daddy's little girl, she doesn't hear him
when he crushes her, she can't feel her screams are silent
hides in the corners of her mind where she plays contently
she leaves this nightmare far behind, she escapes inside her dreams
floating high above her bed
staring at her father's head
wishing one of them were dead
so this hell could finally end
10: Slipping Away
I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping away
I gave it all but no one cared
I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping away
my God it's slipping away
I gave it all but no one cared
I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping away
I feel it slipping away
no more pain, and no more fear
I feel it slipping away
I just can't learn to forget
I'm choking on the memories
choking on regret
I tried but I can't find a way
to untangle all the pieces
after they've been thrown away
I will not suffer this loss
of you again and again and again
I refuse to continue to live
in this perpetual nightmare
I decide it ends right here
I feel it slipping
I feel it slipping
everything is slipping away